Check Out Those Smiles

31 August 2009




Recent Happenings That Make Me Smile:

-walking in the cool sunlight of morning
-riding a bike
-actually making a real effort to play raquetball
-drinking sweet tea and eating a muffin while listening to Jimmy Buffet outside (before class)
-reading what makes people happy
-asking people what makes them happy
-journeying to a new place
-"swimming"
-being outdoors
-drinking a javalanche
-having EVERY SINGLE THING I ate in one day being top notch
-a professor with a British Accent
-living on my own
-being at JMU
-having old/new friends coming to be fellow dukes
-reading some touching stories
-thinking about working at Disney World/studying in Britain ;)
-eating powder sugar-covered chex cereal with a friend
-taking pictures of everything

-getting 'snail mail'
-days with the perfect temperature
-finding a place that matches with your personality.... if I could choose to be a place - this may just be it.
-knowledge of how good life truly is/can be

Live Your Life with...

Zest.
Courage.
Love.
Hope.
Freedom.
Purpose.
Faith.
Openness.
Strength.

Sometimes just living seems to be a struggle. Day to day something comes up and all the little things can just get you down.

Not today.

Not this week.

I've been so much happier since coming back to college. Its as if I can leave all my anger, concerns, doubts, and hatreds behind me. I don't consider myself that type of person.... but when you're in *such* a negative atmosphere for so long, well, it begins to sort of seep into you.

However, being back at Madison makes me feel like I'm granted my liberty again - I can live my life to its fullest and the way I choose.

Ever so surely I am making more decisions about my schedule, my classes, my free time, my friends. Living off campus has provide more opportunities for me to be my own person as well. I love making memories. Being with people. Showing school spirit. Living as if each day is perfect. Each day is. I know this attitude will inevitably fall downwards as stressors build up (yes, even here) but as for now, I am so overjoyed to just be home.

I love college. I love today. I love my life.

A Peaceful Love

21 August 2009

Often I've found that things that make me the happiest are the moments I spend with my friends when just talking or making jokes. I love being held in Noah's arms while sleep hovers on the edges of our minds... My love for people tends to be bright and consuming but today, the utter depth and peacefulness seem to be seeping into me.

The smallest actions, touches, and moments seem to make my life feel full. Thats not to say that I can't enjoy an 'outloud' moment with my friends while we're having a lot of fun, its just different. When things are fun, loud, and involve bunches of laughter they're equally as wonderful but its as if you can't wipe the grin off of my face. When its something soft and small though its the completeness of intimacy. Loud jokes and games are no longer required but instead you can just rest in each others company and feel complete bliss. Everyone has felt the need for a hug when you feel lonely and sad and whether its a true friend or a love who fulfills your need, you know you're cared for.

You lose sight of how special some things are after a while which is a complete shame. Holding hands, having your legs touch while sitting beside each other, and when you catch a certain someone looking at you without realizing you see them - all of these things can cause inner elation yet after a period of time they become the 'normal'. Its difficult not to take things for granted sometimes and with luck they will always remain important.

Some things I hope to never stop appreciating:
hugs
holding hands
talks in the dark
a sleepy boyfriend
a girlfriend's knowing smile
soft smiles
cuddling and leaning into someones body
crinkle in her eyes that tell me she's happy
one facial expression that conveys everything you need to know

There are several moments already that I've had to record with friends so that I won't be able to forget them. Sometimes you come back from an experience and want to tell everyone what happened but these are moments I take back and treasure.

Look Out!!! (Its Ladies Night)

04 August 2009

Do you ever have the sudden urge to hang out with a certain friend (or group of friends)? I think I have that happen most often when I'm craving something. For instance, I saw my girlfriend from school this past Friday and we started talking about books and we wandered around a bookstore for half an hour and sat down in its little coffee shop to talk. I love her for her interest in politics, religion, and reading. That makes us very compatible (especially since our beliefs/likes in those areas are relatively similar). I CRAVE someone to talk to about books. Not just the books that we've both read though because I like suggestions. She reads more young adult/fiction than I do but I read more in general so we each have selections to offer to the other person. She's already promised me The Time Traveler's Wife when I get back to JMU. I can't wait.

Plus, I saw one of my friends moms at the downtown library yesterday which made me miss my friend. She is SO much fun and if I need girl time then she's who I run to. We can talk about guys all night long, play games, talk about the past (we've been friends for probably around fourteen years), and we just have FUN together. Last time I was with her we just hit up yard sales together and ate ice cream once we were done. She's coming down to JMU this year too. :D

Today I'll be seeing one of my very best friends from high school and we don't see each other very much any more because I'm at college and she is raising a son. Our lives took on different paths but because we've had some major life changes in the past two years we understand each other on a whole other level. Very few of my friends have undergone such changes in their lives at this point and we can talk about pretty much anything as a result. She's the cute girlfriend (who reminds me of my mom vaguely) that I always appreciate. For example, she's the one who sends me cards/packages while I'm at school and they always have a picture or two of her son. The most recent cards she sent me was an apology of sorts for being so busy this summer and then she sent My Little Pony stickers to help make it even happier. None of my other friends do things like that and I LOVE cuteness. ;)

When I was thinking about this yesterday I realized that I really don't have enough girl time. Nearly all my friends that I hang out with (especially in the summer) are guys and I need some attention from females too. Generally I don't get along with girls quite as well long term but I think for a day of relaxation and fun its probably exactly the way to go. I hope I can keep that in mind once I go back to college. I already sent one of my friends from school a list of things I'd like to do this year. Maybe I can make those some events that I can do with my girlfriends. I don't exactly think I'm "missing out" on girl stuff but when I follow the expectations on occasion it certainly is a lot of fun!
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